I don't know why i get this nervous lately.
I think every single word Joe said to me over and over again,and clearly he's being nervous too because of the moving-to-HK shit.I hate that i can't help him more and meanwhile i always pissed him off.WHAT THE FUCK!!
I mean,i can be really cute and sweet to him sometimes.He loves me so much-i can tell.Maybe i always want more from him while in fact he can't give that much to me.What i need is a normal boyfriend who only loves me.But this is not what he can offer.He has a bf who is a lucky asshole(don't hate me for saying that Joe,you can understand how i feel). So,our relationship is becoming really really familiar cause i always face it : he's straight to me,a staight guy i've fallen in love.And it sucks cause i fucking always fall in love with my straight best friends! SUCKS!
OK,this is what i can do.Try to work hard and try to meet a real available boy.Try my best to make Joe happy as a best friend,so i won't lose him(I never want to lose this guy,ever ever ever~~).And Try to understand how friendship between two yag boys works.
Joe loved me in the first place because i was cool about things.I'm a cool guy,i know that.So,keep being a cool boy,relax,chill out.
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